Weigh In

It's Tuesday and that means weigh in day. So this week presented some challenges.

Wednesday night I met with the PTO gals to discuss some up coming events and like always we met at the Shay which is this great little coffee shop that has the best Cherry Lemonade. I did pretty good the rest of the week but come the weekend, it all went down hill. As I previously posted Saturday was crazy busy but had an opportunity to hang out with a good friend and enjoy some amazing pizza from their families restaurant. But as well all know good food normally comes with high calories and a ton of regret. So how did I do you ask? I weighed in this morning at 177.0. This is great news.

I had a doctor appointment yesterday and found out that I have a bacteria infection in my arms which is great fun. But, what I learned from the nurse was super exciting and wonderful news. I have lost (according to their scale) 32 pounds since my all time high. This was amazing news. I had forgotten about being over 200 - and not only was I over 200 I was 212 pounds. I do not want to remember that girl, but if I must then I would like to introduce her to you as well. She is wearing 18W jeans and a 2X top. She is a big girl with a beautiful family.

Met in the middle...

I had one of those crazy busy weekends. It was a run, run, run - now stop and catch your breath so you can run again. So Saturday we had volleyball in the early am followed up AWANA race; all before noon. Aaron took Nicole to volleyball and I got the other girls ready for the AWANA race. It was so exciting to watch. The girls had a good time; well most of the time. MiKayla took 1st in the turtle division. She wasn't happy being the slowest racer. After the race we headed shopping and then to a birthday party at our local YMCA. Because I am so unhappy with the way I look I choice not to swim and sit on the sidelines watching everyone else have a good time. This is what I do though. I worry so much about what others will think and say that I don't enjoy life and miss out on things with my family. Saturday even we drove an hour up north to see some good friends. They have 3 boys the same age as our kids so the girls love visiting with them. We did pizza for dinner and chips and rice crispy treats and bread sticks and pop.. All weaknesses of mine; but happy to say that the pizza didn't win, nor did I we met in the middle. I ate one slice of this amazing buffalo chicken pizza, and a half slice of steak pizza. Both were amazing and the old me would have eaten the whole pizza. I had a small glass of diet coke. I said no to the rice crispy treat. Where I failed was the chips and bread sticks. I gave in and ate 15 chips. They tasted so good. I also ate 1 whole bread stick covered in yummy cheese. Overall I don't think I did too bad, but didn't do very well either. After a great night visiting we made it home around midnight. Sunday was a lazy day. Okay it wasn't lazy just maybe slower. I got the fridge cleaned out and re-stocked. I got the laundry all done up. I caught up on a show or two. I got my workout in. It felt good getting it in, since I had missed it Saturday. Overall it was a good weekend. I am not focusing on the scale for my final weigh in for Aaron's work biggest loser. Hoping to see 3 pounds down this week, but after last week will be happy with 1 pound.

30 things while in my 30's

So I was reading slim Kate's blog. I follow her blog daily and love her. So she recently blogged about 30 things she wants to get done in her 30's. I loved this idea so much that I am stealing the idea, but because I am already 4 months behind I will not plan on doing anything unrealistic. So here it goes....

1. Go roller skating with my kids


2. Have family photo's done (They turned out beautiful in May 2012)


3. Run a 5K (Memorial Day 2013)


4. Walk around the lake (7 miles) (Summer 2013)


5. Run a race of any sort in every state


6. Go Ziplining


7. Wear shorts in public (all summer walking the lake 2013)


8. Buy something sexy to wear


9. Get a body massage


10. Build a 90 day emergency savings fund


11. Volunteer More


12. Start a retirement plan


13. Take a class or lesson


14. Go Skiing


15. Get my passport


16. Purchase a new home


17. Send a message in a bottle


18. Go hiking


19. Make something new out of something old


20. Watch the sunrise and set in the same day from the same location


21. Read 1 book every month for a year.


22. Start recycling


23. Pay off my car


24. Go on a woman's retreat


25. Attend the canoe trip with friends


26. Take my kids on an airplane (Took kids to Disney World in April 2012)


27. Graduate from college (Done June 8th, 2012)


28. Plant a garden (Summer 2013 with sister)


29. Lose all my child gained weight


30. Complete this list

Fighting Through a Funk

Want to know what life is like as the fat friend... well that is me and I will tell you. It is hard. It is so very hard. My low self-esteem and self image holds me back from doing things and I hate that. I hate wearing jeans in the summer because I don't want to show people my legs. I don't want them to see my pale, cellulite filled legs. I wont wear tank tops because I hate my arms and my chest is too big (thanks to being fat). I sit poolside covered up so that know one sees how nasty I look in a swimsuit. I don't want to run around playing any type of sports for fear that someone will see my fat jiggle. I feel like everyone is judge every thing I eat. "Why is that fat girl ordering dessert?"

I spend all my time comparing myself to others. Why can she lose weight but I can't? It's not fair that she lost her baby weight within months of having her baby yet I am 6 years out still waiting for baby fat to drop off. How can she eat anything she wants and not gain?

I question what I am doing wrong and why the weight isn't coming off. I think the hardest part is know that I can be skinny; always was but now I can't even get into a healthy weight range. Lately it's gotten worse. My husbands company started a biggest loser contest oh maybe 11 weeks ago. This is the final week. I am in 4th place which is great but 3rd sounds so much better. The problem is I need to lose 3 1/2 pounds this week plus whatever current 3rd place loses. I want that 3rd place so bad. I have been killing it workout wise. I have tried to avoid my night snacking but still the scale does not move. I am so annoyed and frustrated I could scream and would if I thought it would help me lose weight.

I feel so discouraged lately. I want to see 2+ pounds lost each week and only having point something is tough to take. How to I mentally get out of this funk.

Lack of Will Power

I have a confession to make.... I gave into my night snacking... Not only did I give in and eat a Jalapeno string cheese but I also ate 2 stuffed crackers. That's not all, before the night ended I also ate skinny cow dark chocolate clusters. That is 350 calories... WHY!!!! I had eaten dinner and wasn't hungry. What happens is that I am sitting on the living room floor surfing the net or working on school work and I get bored and munch. I feel I need to munch from 6-10 pm every night. This is my dirty secret and why I am not dropping more weight each week then I should.

Weigh In

It's Tuesday and that means I weigh in today. I lost but not enough to get excited. I weighed in at 178.4 which means I only lost 0.6 pounds. I am suppose to be happy that I lost, but can't be. I busted my butt this week. I feel frustrated that I workout 6 days a week, drink my water and am not dropping 1-2 pounds a week. I only have 8 weeks until our vacation and still 9 pounds that I wanted to lose. The only place that I can make a change would be my eating habits. So I am really going to try to watch my calorie intake this week and see what happens. Wednesday (tomorrow) night is my last night for my online class so I am going to try to double my Wednesday night workout starting next week - while the girls are at church. Maybe that will help. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

Drained

Emotionally drained that is how I feel this morning. Maybe even a little defeated and discouraged. I woke up this morning and as always I went downstairs, stepped on the scale and what did I find +1 on the scale. I can not think of any reason for this. I killed myself last night working out, I ate good, I drank more water than normal. I spoke before about trying to overcome my addition to the scale or feeling that I am a slave to the morning routine. Why would this morning be any different?

I except to hit a plateau at some point just not week 3. My goal of 9 in 9 seems so far away now, and even impossible. Before I get too discouraged I plan to evaluate my plan and see if any changes can be made.

Here are a few tips for getting past a plateau:

• Reassess your habits. Look back at your food and activity records. Make sure you haven't loosened the rules, letting yourself get by with larger portions or less exercise.
• Cut more calories. Reduce your daily calorie intake by 200 calories — provided this doesn't put you below 1,200 calories. Fewer than 1,200 calories a day may not be enough to keep you from feeling hungry all of the time, which increases your risk of overeating.
• Rev up your workout. Increase the amount of time you exercise by an additional 15 to 30 minutes. You might also try increasing the intensity of your exercise, if you feel that's possible. Additional exercise will cause you to burn more calories.
• Pack more activity into your day. Think outside the gym. Increase your general physical activity throughout the day by walking more and using your car less, or try doing more yard work or vigorous spring cleaning.

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/weight-loss-plateau/MY01152/NSECTIONGROUP=2

I will review, adjust, and keep working toward my goal.

Water, Water, Water

Can you guess what today's blog is going to be about? You guessed it; WATER. We have all heard it before; our bodies need water. I am always being told that I do not drink enough water. So I researched how much water should I be drinking. I found conflicting studies and research. What I did find though was an interesting article that if you eat a healthy diet, about 20% of your water may come from the foods you eat. Water is an obvious source for your daily fluid needs. Other good beverages include mile, herbal teas especially green tea, low-sodium broth, and juice both 100% fruit and vegetable juices.

We all know what good sources are and we know that our body needs water but how much? So I found online a daily hydration calculator. I was asked weight, fitness level, climate, and a few other questions. Once it was complete I was told how much water that day I need to consume. Today I need to consume 111.2 ounces. WOW I am not drinking enough water. I have a 16 ounce water bottle and need to drink 6 of them. I am only drinking 2-3 of them a day. With my healthy eating I can reduce my water to 89 ounces a day so I only need to drink 4-5 bottles a day. Time to increase the water.. Drink up everyone.

Weigh In

Tuesday, Tuesday, Tuesday

Tuesday is weigh in day.... and this morning I did just that. I am down!!!! I weighed in at 179.0 so that gives me a 3 pound loss for the week. I'll take it.. I would also like to report that I am below the 180's. I am super excited and really hope I can stay below them. Our big family vacation is approaching rapidly and I really wanted to be at 170 by the time we left. 9 weeks and 9 pounds. Very doable but not something I have been able to do for a long time. I plan to keep on working out, eating right, and staying positive.

So I took a beginning photo of myself a couple weeks ago. I think I will post it here. As you can see I still have a long road ahead of me. In this picture I am wearing an XL shirt and 16W pants.

To reward myself, plan for vacation and to just feel good I have started tanning. I understand the health risk but mentally I feel good so for now I am going to go for awhile. I am hoping to have enough of a base built up before vacation that I will feel a little less albino.

Feeling Good

Whenever I start I new "diet" I get new gear but this time - I have found some wonderful gear. I have purchased 3 new DVD's. Walk Away the Pounds - 3 mile, Walk Slim - 4 mile, and Walk at Home the 5 mile. Each one a little different than the other. The 3 mile DVD uses free hand weights. The 4 mile DVD uses a firm bands. The 5 mile video doesn't have any additional strength training. Even through the 5 mile DVD is the longest; it is the easiest one. I am feeling good. I completed the 5 mile tonight and feel stronger than ever. I really hope to see the pounds melt off soon.


I have set a small goal for myself. I want to get to the build up enough endurance to walk around the lake this spring in an hour or less. That is 7 miles. I have another set of walking DVD's I want to buy. It is the 21 day plan.

Working out makes me feel good about myself. I really hope all this pays off in the end.

The big word "Discouraged"

Have you ever tried losing weight alongside your husband, boyfriend, brother or any male for that fact? If so you've probably experienced a little frustration when you compared your weight-loss rates. The fact is we are different. Men and women tackle problems differently. Men tend to be linear thinkers and more businesslike in their approach to weight loss, while women are multi-taskers who become more emotionally involved in weight loss. The way you mentally approach weight loss can make a difference.

• Stay positive; it’s not a loss cause. Women do lose weight and they do keep it off. Don't use the slower pace as an excuse to not try.

• Know that weight-loss strategies (plans) do work. Some women tend to throw up their hands, believing that nothing works, but that’s not true. We have a lot of good diet plans that actually do work to lose weight. What works for some may not work for you. Find what works for you and stick with it.

• Start believing that you can do it. Believe in yourself and stay focused. Even if you get bored or frustrated because you don't think your plan is working, stick with it. Set goals for yourself and stay focused on those goals.

• Understand your challenges and limitations. Know yourself. Each person is different. Where you struggle when you try to lose weight? Do you eat when you’re sad or frustrated, or stop working out when you don't have a workout buddy to encourage you? Set yourself up for success by preparing for those roadblocks and figuring out in advance how you will overcome them.

Reward yourself mentally for every success you have. It’s not about how weight they have lost; it’s about how much weight you have. Dropping only ONE pound per week (or less) may seem dreadfully slow, but even if you get a HALF a pound a week fat loss, that’s still progress. Celebrate it. Keep that up over time, and you will reach your goal. Persistence pays.

No one can lose weight without diet, exercise and sacrifice. Make the effort to learn about the healthiest and most efficient ways to lose weight, and then enjoy your own success. Weight loss isn't about winning a race; it's about crossing the finish line at your own pace.

Scale Slave

I am tied to my scale. Every morning regardless of any other factors, my morning routine involves stepping on the scale to see what I weigh. There’s nothing wrong with knowing how much you weigh, right? In my head I am thinking, “How could you not weigh yourself? How could you live without knowing what you weigh?”

It seems only natural – you gain weight, the scale increases and of course you lose weight, the scale decreases. The scale determines my mood. I am depressed when the numbers stay the same (which isn't very often). I let the scale make me angry, tired, depressed, moody, and distressed when the numbers go up. Why is it we feel the need to step on scale?

Weighing ourselves on a daily basis may seem like a good idea, after all, we would be able to see any weight increase immediately and aim to take action to lose it again. Another advantage of daily weighing is that while trying to lose weight, we can regularly check our weight loss and be able to make sure that we are making progress or taking action if we are not.The down side of weighing ourselves daily is that it can be mentally frustrating. How many of us weigh ourselves one day only to find that the next day we have gained one or two pounds? Our weight can fluctuate on a daily basis due to many factors.It is actually our personal choice as to how often we weigh ourselves, however we should be aware of the fact that we may jeopardise our weight loss if we focus too intently on the scale. We can be in danger of disregarding other signs of progress such as inch loss and muscle building, particularly if we are following an exercise regime which is toning our body and building lean muscle mass.

Oprah Article - Why Women Let Themselves Go

Why is it that we as woman as mothers put ourselves last. This evening I found myself stressing about school work, kids homework, housework, and yes even real work. So again why is it we can find time for everyone and everything but ourselves. I came across this article I want to share with you.

http://www.oprah.com/spirit/Why-Women-Let-Themselves-Go

What caught my eye was when I read "we put ourselves last on the list, and often have very little left". This is so true. How often do you get your hair done? Do you take a walk without any kids, or feeling rushed to get back home? Or when was the last time you took time to vent and reflect with your husband or girl friends about "you" and how you feel and what "you" need. That is hard to say out loud; "I need". I challenge myself and you to take time for yourself and most importantly say out loud; "I need time for myself, and I need you to want me to." Read this article and find your strength to stop letting yourself go.

Weigh In

So it's Tuesday and what does that mean? Weigh in day. I had a long weekend with the girls. Aaron spent the weekend away with the guys and I struggled at home with my demons aka the fridge and boredom eating. I got my workout in every night and drank my water but had a hard time controlling my portions. Just like I do every morning; I wake up, head down stairs (counts as working out right?), go to the bathroom, get naked and weigh myself. I am a slave to the routine of weighing myself daily. But, today it counts because it is weigh in day. So this morning I weighed in at 182.8 which means after a week of working out 5 days I didn't even lose a single pound. I am suppose to give myself a pep talk and say but a lose is a lose and it takes time, but the real me inside is disappointed and feeling discouraged. I am not going to let that feeling bring me down though... tonight I am going to get my workout in, watch my calories and record, record, record. If I put it in my mouth I write it down.

~Unknown Author: Instead of giving myself reasons why I can't, I give myself reasons why I can.

Motivation

This morning I posted my first blog. I spoke about motivation and a wonderful old photo that depressed me but more importantly it motivated me. I get fired up reading other people's success stories. Real life people who struggle with weight lose. Some have won and some have lost and some still struggle. I would like to share some of those motivating stories with you.

This is Katie's story..

http://www.runsforcookies.com/2011/10/logging-my-food.html

Katie inspires me. I feel like I can relate to her. Mother of young family. Just turned/turning 30. Living in Michigan. I think "My GOD if she can (and heavier than me) than I can".

New Years Resolution

Like most Americans I made a New Years Resolution to lose weight. Same one I make every year, and fail at every year. I have a lot of weight to lose. Even more to reach my personal goal. So with 50 pounds to lose this is my journey. This morning I found a little bit of motivation waiting for me (thanks to a friend). It is a photo of my husband and I taken almost 11 years ago, and 65 pounds lighter. I barely remember that girl but I remember those pants. They were my black slim cut size 5 perfect dress pants. I felt tall (which is a huge deal for someone 5' 2'), slim, and most importantly sexy. 

November 2011
My daughter and I

Looking at myself now I wonder - how did I get this way? How did I allow myself to gain so much weight and not fight to lose it? I am tired of not fighting for MY happiness and MY health. I am fighting for ME.