Sick

Okay stop reading now if you don't want to read another "I am depressed blog post'. Here it is.. I am so depressed today; okay for the past week to be honest. I worked so hard to lose weight and had lost a nice amount of weight but as of this morning I have gained almost all of it back. I am so depressed and every pound back on I sink further down into a deep depression. I have now made myself physically sick. I don't know if it's because it's so hot out and we have had company and not getting much sleep but I gained 4 pounds this week and can't get out of a mental slump. Why can't I get back on the bandwagon and start losing weight? I did it before and can do it so what the hell is wrong with me?

I don't want to hear advice or really hear anything from anyone. I know what I need to do and how to do it. I know how I feel when I do - I just am not ready to do it. So for now I am fat, ugly, and depressed..